This, my friends, is a serious burger.

This unassuming Texas icehouse, located on I-10 inside the Loop, has been grilling a spectacular burger for years. It's arguably the best in Houston.

A great burger starts with the meat, and Christian's is superb. It's moist and tender, but not dripping with grease... the ooze factor is just about perfect. The meat has a nice char-grilled flavor, and it's complemented by wonderful fresh vegetables. The bun is browned on the grill; nothing fancy, but it completes the burger with zen-line balance.

This is a big burger. The single fills me up easily; the double should be reserved for professional athletes who are breaking training.

Christian's doesn't skimp on the fries, either. They're well-cooked, crisp on the outside and tender inside; again, just right.

If you're a burger fan, and haven't tried Christian's, go right now. We'll wait 'till you get back and tell us about it.

Christian's Totem: 7340 Washington Ave, Houston, 77007, 713-864-9744

I like burgers. I love good burgers. I adore great burgers. When I heard about Smashburger, I said to myself, "Self, another foreign (i.e. from out of Texas) burger chain has invaded Houston. Maybe it'll be OK, but I don't have high hopes. It's a chain, so it's going to be lame."

I was dead wrong.


Smashburger makes an excellent hamburger. It starts with a hand-formed patty (1/2 pound in this case) smashed fairly flat. It's topped with a slice of thickish American cheese, and remarkably fresh veggies -- we're talking truly crisp here. The assembled product is perched atop a fresh eggy bun, and the burger hangs over the bun about 3/4" on all sides.

Interestingly enough, this burger doesn't come across at all as an upscale burger. It's more of a traditional, down-home griddled burger, but prepared with remarkable balance and attention to detail.

How's it taste? Superb. The beef is griddled expertly, with plenty of ooze left. The cheese/beef combination approaches the Golden Mean; the combined flavor was about as dead-on as could be. The super fresh veggies added their flavors to the mix, but everything stayed distinct.

Christian's Totem, Beck's Prime, and the rest of the top notch burger joints in town now have a new, serious competitor. I'd have to give Beck's a slight edge for more flavorful meat (the mesquite taste is excellent) but Smashburger nails the beef/cheese ratio and the combined flavor is really excellent. I think this is the best chain burger in town. I still have to give the overall edge to Christian's Totem... but the mediocre experience that is Christian's Tailgate in Midtown demonstrates just how impressive Smashburger's consistent approach really is.

There may be better burgers in Houston, but I'd not fault anyone for naming Smashburger as his favorite.

(Update: A friend pointed out that I'd not mentioned the fries, and that is a mistake that should be corrected. The Smashfries are unique and delicious. It's cone of paper (artfully presented in an iron holder) filled with thinish, machine-cut fries, probably thawed and fried. The magic is in the execution: They're fried perfectly; crisp on the outside, soft on the inside, and then seasoned with rosemary, olive oil, and sea salt. Very unique, and a wonderful counterpoint to the great burger.)

The biggest fault? The location. They're at Kirby and S. Main. Although I do see property values rising in that neighborhood now.

When's that Woodlands location opening?


Sliders have become so trendy that just about every casual dining establishment has added them to the menu. It seems that every time we sit down, we're confronted with sliders.

And that's not a bad thing. We like hamburgers, we love good ones, and we crave great ones.
On a recent lunch outing, we gave Reef's sliders a try.
They're three plump little hamburgers placed on a nice egg-y bun, topped with carmelized onions and served with a side of fries. We'd heard great things about these sliders, and honestly, we were underwhelmed. The hand-formed patties were thick but overcooked, and the only notable flavor was from the onions. These sliders were begging for some thick-sliced bacon and a gentler touch on the grill. The generic fries were clearly out of a bag.
Yesterday, a very pleasant surprise. We were waiting for car repairs, and Hooters was in walking distance. Normally this place isn't on the radar, but perhaps that bit of prejudice has now been corrected. Hooters is known for their chicken wings, but their sliders are among the best we've tried.
The formula is simple: Hand-formed beef patty, fluffy white bun, melted American cheese, pickles, raw onions. But the execution was excellent: The beef was cooked medium, with a nice pink tinge at the middle of the tiny, thickish patty. The cheese was nicely melted and the quantity was just right, and it fused the veggies to the patty. And the bun was light and fluffy, sealing the deal. Two order sizes are available: Four sliders in the standard order, or six in the large order, which we found perfect for sharing. And the crisp onion strings were a nice alternative to the generic fries.
If someone had told me that we'd prefer Hooter's sliders to Reef's, I would have laughed. But tasting is believing. If there's one rule when you chow down in H-Town, it's that you should throw your preconceptions out the window. You might find yourself pleasantly surprised.
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